So the Oilers play the LA Kings tonight in another meaningless game do they? And Gregor is doing married guy stuff before his show and asked us to write the GDB on his behalf? How will we live with the pressure of trying to describe a game that will be forgotten by 99% of us within days?
Fingers and brain don’t fail us now!*
BETTER THAN NOTHING
A great many folks have done a great many things in the name of "better than nothing." Say you are the unfortunate fellow in the picture above. You say to your wife "Honey, now that the kids are grown up and have left the house we should get a pet! How about a Golden Retriever?"
When the wife strolls in with two spider monkeys and digs up boxes of old childeren’s clothing from the basement you quickly come to the sobering realization that the dog you wanted probably isn’t on its way. But do you shun the creepy little buggers? No. You dress them up in the family’s finest and grimace your way through a series of photos at the local Walmart.
You know why?
Because it’s better than nothing.
BETTER THAN NOTHING 2
Now what if you are this little girl? Your parents have set up the video camera and on the eve of Santa’s arrival you get to open an early Christmas present. Little would you know that they watch the Jimmy Kimmel show and he has put out a challenge to viewers to give their kids crappy Christmas presents and video their reactions.
How are you to know that Christmas has turned from a joyous day for Children into a joyous day for Jimmy Kimmel and his burning desire to ruin everything? As this big Chicago Bears fan opens up a Packers jersey and promptly flips her Dad the Christmas Bird, we can see that in some cases something is definitely not better than nothing.
WHAT’S IT GONNA BE?
So Oilers what’s it gonna be tonight? We will be tuning into the game from beginning to end despite the fact it is Friday night, there are a myriad of other things to do and we know this game doesn’t exactly mean the world to you.
Jason Strudwick described this in gory detail in his earlier article and we can’t help but ask ourselves how we are supposed to find inspiration to watch the game when the millionaires collecting bags of cash can’t be bothered to get amped up themselves.
But tune in we will. Why? Because it is better than nothing. Even the worst Oilers game in history is better than nothing. Even a 1-0 shutout loss to some awful team on a Sunday afternoon is better than nothing. Even a pre-season game between split squads of the Oilers and the Columbus Blue Jackets is better than nothing.
And in a few short weeks that is exactly what we will be left with. Nothing.
So go Oilers. Snipe a few would ya?
LINEUPS, TENDER AND SCRATCHES
According to the Oilers twitter feed the scratches tonight are Belanger, Omark, Barker, Petrell and Fedun. More information to follow as it becomes available. Linus Omark also tweeted the message above which suggests he is either confused by something or the question mark key on his Blackberry is stuck. More information on that too should we find out more.
MORE
Apparently Linus Omark didn’t tweet about a hundred frustrated question marks because he found out he is a healthy scratch tonight. Even though he tweeted it right around the time he would have been finding out the bad news. We can safely make this conclusion because he tweeted in his charming way that we are all wrong if that’s what we all thought.
Ha ha! Jokes on us right Linus? And you thought he was on a different page than Oilers management. Scratch that kind of thinking you negative nelly.
*That’s obviously what she said
This site will NEVER have a better picture than that poor bugger with the monkeys. If EVER a man perfected the “kill me. kill me now” look it’s him.
Slow clap for brilliance!
lol This is taken from the Wanye Collection Circa 2041
You mean that’s your future?!?!?! Or your past that will come back to haunt you?
Omark’s response to being in the PB is hilarious.
A big oiler win to beat down king chances, some payback for luring away Gretz with morally empty L.A. promises and thier evil blonde temptress Janet. Plus, maybe Calgary can pass the kings and finish 9th, so they get a slightly worse draft spot and maybe delude themselves a little longer thus delaying the inevetable rebuild. 3-1 oil with 2 goals for RNH.
Omark is so done in Oilerville
Really? I would make it 70-30 he does return to Sweden. But who can say. The team is 29th not because of Omark. Perhaps things may have been different if was in the lineup. Maybe we would have been 28th.
I’m not sure about that guy with the monkey, I think he secretly loves it deep down.
Well you know it’s the wife who is driving the bus here. Look at the smile!!! SHE’S in heaven! Buddy looks like he wishes he was the guy who told Joe Pesci to get his shine box in Goodfellas!
On a hockey topic, why did they recall Paajarvi. Is he playing tonight?
Imagine so. Suspect he trimmed those sideburns.
Did he take any of the nerve tonic?
As opposed to Linus Omark, who has decided barbers are his enemy.
The Wayne family photo. I’ll give you 2 guesses which one is Wanye.
Hint: blue plaid was his favorite in those days.
PS: I’ve let my twitter obsession fade.. They called up Paajarvi? Why in hell did they do that? Is OKC Tanking with him on the team?
Seriously, somebody tell this team that they are in 29th place – why the hell don’t they play Omark.
Because he isnt going to be an Oiler next year and the Team would rather play people who might actually have an NHL future?
So lets make sure his trade value is as low as possible. Wow, great plan Oilers, great use of a possible trade asset
So we can get a 4th round pick instead of a 5th round pick but we have to watch Omark play hockey poorly? No thanks. He isnt changing anybody’s mind in the next handful of games.
You want a flashy puck handler who might score 30 points, excite fans in the shootout, but give up tons defensively? He’s your guy. I think people already know that.
Arch you just love kicking your goat while he’s down don’t you?
Yes, but in all seriousness that IS why he isnt playing. It’s pretty obvious he isnt in their plans and guys like Hartikainen and Paajarvi still are.
If Omark had the confidence of the coach and the organization he would be playing.
Omark is not a part of the future. He is whiny and not good enough.
And as for the inevitable chirps about playing to raise his value. Really? Do you really think “showcasing” him would accomplish anything.
He gets qualified and then traded. End of story.
Omark’s newest tweet.
“its not becuase im helthy scratch like some people think!
“
Let me guess: Awkwardfamilyphotos.com?
Gotta be one of the funniest photos I’ve seen in months
On a side note #NugeForCalder
C’mon and throw Omark into a couple of the last few games and see what he can do on the top 6.
And while you are at it, sign the two spider monkeys to a tryout contract, give them Todd Marchant’s old equipment and try them out on the blue line for a game or two. Let’s see any opposing forwards get by our poo flinging defencemen (ah, it’s just like having Pronger back on “D”, isn’t it?)…
Really monkeys on defense…. isn’t that what Barker is already??????????? If I were to get a couple of monkeys on this team they would be taking Lowe and Tambos jobs. I’m sure the trade off would be pretty much equal except the monkeys would probably do more.
Hahahahaha so Hall’s Labia Surgery, Nipples and know Monkey Management hahahahaha this has been one of the best weeks on Oilers Nation. hahahaha TGIF
*laughing hysterically slowly morphs into inconsolable crying*
Off topic: Seattle is in preliminary stages of planning a new waterfront $500 mil US arena. Of course it will be completed before our downtown project breaks ground; my question is will Katz use Seattle as leverage or will the NHL wait to move Phoenix so it remains in a big market[Quebec is 1/5 the size of Seattle]?
The man pushing forward the Seattle plan is a wealthy Seattle native who loved the Sonics,similar to our situation except the Seattle rich dude actually loved the local pro team, he didn’t just do some lines of pharmaceutical grade with the teams stars, allegedly.
Any chance another local ownership group steps up? Absentee landlords can be a drag.
I don’t know who I want to win. I want Eberle and the Nuge to get 4 points each. And I love seeing the oilers win. But if we win it helps the Flames get closer to the playoffs. If we lose it helps the Kings get closer to the playoffs. If we win it helps the Oilers get more points than the leafs. But if the Leafs have more points they could get a better draft pick.
Ugh
Dubya^ here i thought it was because this poor bugger married a Cathy Bates Look-a-Like
as for Omark?
… take your attitude elsewhere
good luck with the rest of your career
decisions, decisions
Im stoked to hear that Belanger is taking a seat tonight bout bloody time imo.
I want the Oil to win more than where they place for the draft, ST has the choice of 3 good dmen to pick from, I could care less about the top 2 picks.
Conspericy theroy: the lafs win the lottery because “it’s the center of all that is holy” but Burke trades said pick to get Nash, forever handcuffing the team in the salary cap NEVER TO WIN THE CUP AGAIN!!!! MUUUHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!
My question is why do we keep playing potter? God is he just awful. He just doesn’t do enough offensively to make up for his complete defensive lapse. He will never be a full time nhl defensemen on a quality nhl team…. I hate favouritism and renney just loves him don’t no why but ya
Ya Potter better be our #7 d-man moving forward, he’s not good enough in my opinion as well. Maybe they can alternate him and Sutton in and out of the lineup, but personally I’d prefer Sutton in that #6 spot.
Potter had a really good stretch at the beginning of the season and then after his injury he was not very good. I think they gave him a contract because he had played better and was a good fit at first but has slumped. But look at Peckham, he played really well last season and this season hes barely ahead of Barker. If they are going to carry 8 defensman them Potter makes sense as a 7 or 8 and at the price is a good option.
Why bother watching a meaningless game involving a team soon destined to be swinging clubs instead of sticks?
Because it beats watching the Flambes lose. Again.
It looks like Omark was a good choice for goat this year. Khabby starts so we will probably lose. I hope we win just so we can bench him for the rest of the season. As for benching, good to see Belanger take a seat. He has played 74 mostly indifferent games for us this season so it makes sense to give a guy like Vande Velde a chance. That said, I am not sure why Hordichuk and Eager are both dressed seeing as they both played less than 5 minutes last game. If it were me, I would have Petrell in instead of Eager because Eager’s give a crap metre is extremely low right now.
Anyways, 3-1 Kings tonight. NUUUUUUUUUGGGGGEEEEE picks up the lone Oilers goal.
Just wondering how Omark can be a goat when he’s only played 14 games? I think most people on here are just saying he’s not good enough and he has a poor attitude, which is a toxic combination. He might prove us wrong in the future, but I think he needs a change of scenery.
Change of scenery… he hasn’t even been here for two years yet. He does need a change but in attitude and pay his dues. I think he still feels he should be handed the prime ice time even though he hasn’t proved that he deserves it.
Holy crap, is it just me or does that monkey in the dress have a disproportionately large package?
The better question should be why you are checking out a monkeys junk.
How can you miss it?
Partly because it’s not something I look for and partly because I’m colourblind 😉
that poor basturd from the other day who threw a little hissy fit when there was the possible nipple sighting probably ruined his computer when he threw holy water after seeing that monkey dank on the screen.
NO it’s just you, you have a disproportionate large package. wait…what….
WOWWWWWWWWWW I did NOT notice that when I found that picture. Yes, I can now add “edited out wang from Spider Monkey dress up picture” to the old resume.
A monkey with a fierce whang in a dress. Wanye you’re a sicko! Thanks for the edit!
That was too much even for a pervert like me!
Wang? Isn’t that the dude who owns the Islanders?
All this success has made you soft. Please turn in your pervert badge to my “completely ordinary, definitely NOT used for raping” van. It’s currently parked across from Jasper Place High.
The one with the total soundproofing and the candy dispensers for door handles?
I’ve also added a giant neon sign that reads “FREE JUSTIN BIEBER MERCH!” Not to attract you or anything, but, I mean, a fish is a fish regardless of what bait you use, AMIRIGHT?
I seen one the other day that said “FREE PUPPIES AND KITTENS!” guess that wasn’t you eh.
It may have been, I have no idea. But I can tell you it definitely did not have free puppies and kittens. No puppies, no kittens.. just….
*trails off then runs to the corner to suck thumb and sob*
FREE BIEBER STUFF?? Even though I know this is probably a trap….
*approaches van slowly*
Yuck man… just yuck.
Speaking of Yuck, I am dreading another two months of watching other teams chase the stanley cup. So yeah… this is better than nothing, and it is a LOT better than watching other teams play in the playoffs and not the Oil.
I hear you, but there are some positives about the playoffs, regardless of whether the Oilers are in or not. Watching the Nucks get bounced in the first round would be a great start!
So we now know why the man holding that monkey looks like he’s not thrilled to be there.
@ Mark-LW ….. anyways…..
Petrell and Hartikainen add something the other stiffs on the 3rd and 4th line have not, a willingness and flair for taking the body. Hopefully that is recognized going into next year.
I hope the oilers win. on another thought soo funny Leaf fans are making me laugh hard today. soooo happy i am not or never will be a fan of the leafs. oilers win 4 to 2 tonight with rnh getting 3 points. going to this game so you will hear me cheer f@#king loud and balls out.
????????????? Indeed….
Maybe next year we’ll have a coach that values talent over making sure Eager, Hordichuk and Belanger get plenty of ice time.
So Omark and PRV get a handful of games to “prove” themselves (playing mostly 3rd line), are found wanting, and are now trade fodder?
In the meantime, Gagner gets 5 years and still can’t check a suitcase, let alone a real hockey player, but he still gets lots of rope because he might be approaching his “breakout” year?
Nope, let’s just move along here, nothing to see, no double standards around this coach or team…
I dont recall Omark or Paajarvi ever having a 8 point game.
*checks ye olde timey record book*
Nope. Never happened.
Well, I mean, you could also look at it this way (like a sane person);
Gagner and Omark were both drafted in 2007; Gagner was a spry 18 year old while Omark was 20.
During those 5 years Gagner has played 361 games in the NHL and amassed 219 points. while Omark, who again is 2 years older, has played 65 whole games in the NHL and put up 30 points.
Yeah, why on earth would Gagner ever get more “rope” than Omark……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….
I’m pretty certain that these “GAGNER IS CRAPPY!” dummies are probably the same people that are still lamenting the loss of Rob Schremp.
Gagner is a frustration to watch when he isn’t ‘bringing it’ – like last game. With his size, he’s got to put in a big effort.
Omark’s ????? was a reply to someone telling him to f-off.
I’m not a big Omark fan but I hope he does well wherever he ends up. From what I know of his attitude, it’s pretty good. I’d rather hear the ‘I want to play’ rather than the apparent ‘I’m just putting in time’ that we’ve experienced the past couple of years.
Things are looking up.
And I’m going to the game today.
I don’t know why but I’m actually looking forward to it.
#eatmonkeywangcalgary!